In 2011 our son had a classroom assignment to create a CD “About Me”, containing songs that would tell people something about him. It was a fun project, and I thought it would be a good theme to use for a quick review of the year that was 2011.

This was a year of ups and downs in many ways, including spiritually. I know spiritual development is made in fits and starts, and often one doesn’t see clearly the road ahead. This year, I finished out a fantastic year of catechism teaching and began my inquiry to the Secular Franciscans in earnest, enjoying the company of some of the most wonderful people I’ve ever met. But there have also been times I’ve keenly felt God’s absence this year, especially after the loss of some friends, including one of Patrick’s best friends (and our daughter’s godfather) Mark, the joyous and creative Gingie Noe, and the brother of another of our close friends.

So this year one of my spiritual exercises has been learning how to “be” in those periods when God feels most absent. KT Tunstall’s song speaks to this for me – it’s a beautiful love song that to me is a great “crossover” song about God’s absence.

Speaking of love songs, Patrick and I celebrated our 20th anniversary this year. As part of our year of celebration, we were blessed to have relatively cheap tickets to Turkey practically fall into our laps, so off we went and it was a wonderful trip. Patrick’s great to travel with, and in a city so full of history it was a joy to walk the streets of Istanbul together.

As we walked through the gardens of Topkapi Palace, wild parrots chattered in the background, and I took it as a good omen for our next 20. Parrots also figured into our courtship in Hyde Park so many years ago, under a big tree where dozens of wild parrots would nest and squawk.

Annie Lennox has always been one of my favorite artists, and this one seems to fit as a mark for our first 20 years together.

Maintaining some sort of work-life balance in the midst of so many life changes at home would be difficult enough. But this has also been a tough, if rewarding, year in work. I had the terrific luck to make two presentations on Drupal and content migration at a conference for government webmasters this year, and it was tremendous fun. I helped our organization make a huge leap towards distributed content management this year with the implementation of a Drupal-based series of websites. It’s a huge project for a part-time person, and it’s been a long road, but it’s been an important shift, one that will allow the city to be more responsive to its citizens and manage online content efficiently. Very good bang for the buck. But such a large project in the midst of major life-upheavals really challenged my life-work balance.

Janelle Monae’s Tightrope was in my running playlist many times in 2011. It’s got a great beat and high energy, and seems a good reflection on work-in-life for 2011.

In my running, I hit a nice stride over the summer (so to speak), and decided to push myself a bit. So, in 2011 I accomplished a major goal of finishing my first half-marathon. It was cold, rainy and windy, and I struggled at the end when I hit a physical and mental wall. Still, it was great training and I’ve learned a few things about how to push myself physically without turning running into a chore or hurting myself.

As every runner does from time to time, I’ve felt this past year like I was learning how to run all over again. As the years go by and our bodies change, we have to get re-acquainted with ourselves and be patient. I look forward to more miles in 2012, and think it’ll be a great running year.

I hope your 2011 was great, and that your 2012 will be challenging, blessed and full of wonderful people.

Dance more, pray and sing more, make soup, paint and knit and spend time with those you love. Happy New Year!

Recently, JC Penny removed from its stores a t-shirt bearing the words “I’m too pretty to do homework, so my brother has to do it for me”. They removed it because people complained that the shirt promoted the old stereotype that girls can be smart or pretty, but not both, re-normalizing a stereotype that so many have fought so hard to eliminate from our young daughters’ environments.

Boys and girls alike are keenly tuned in to what their peers are wearing, and how media they encounter portrays “normal” and “successful” girls and boys (as well as women and men).  Girls are bombarded daily by ads for butt-toning shoes for toddlers, Barbie dolls that like shopping but think math is tough, padded bikinis and thongs with the words “eye candy” on them for elementary school girls, and told via way too many outlets their worth is (and should be) measured by their looks.

GeekMomBlog went to bat for JC Penny and the shirt this morning.

I don’t think anybody, including the folks at JCPenney, believes that girls are too pretty to do their own homework or that they should force their brothers into servitude.  I doubt there are any kids that think so, either.

The problem is that it sends a message to girls about what their priorities should be, and that girls should choose between smart & pretty. A message reinforced in our culture over and over again. Shopping is more important. Because how you look is most important. The copy accompanying the JC Penny ad?

Who has time for homework when there’s a new Justin Bieber album out? She’ll love this tee that’s just as cute and sassy as she is.

If she buys this, it’s proof that she is cute and sassy!

GeekMom implies in her post that it’s ok because it’s intended to be ironic. Ironic messages like this are certainly prevalent in our culture. So much so that maybe our kids will grow immune to them, desensitized because they see it so often.

It’s the secret of social ease in this country.  They talk entirely for their own pleasure.  Nothing they say is designed to be heard. – Evelyn Waugh, The Loved One

The problem is that sexualizing our daughters *is* built into commodity culture. If only one shirt existed promoting this message, it would indeed be no big deal. But it’s not one shirt. It’s everywhere. Remember the kids’ movie Robots? How are we going to sell upgrades if people think they’re fine the way they are?

Speaking out against the sexualization and commoditization of our kids is important because it does make change happen. If JC Penny thinks people will boycott their stores if they hawk this kind of merchandise, they’ll put less of it up for sale. We can’t eliminate these messages, but we can fight back. And in fighting back, we in turn set a positive message for our girls.

Update: Wanna do something about it? Girl Scouts of the USA is helping promote the Healthy Media for Youth Act (HB 2513/ SB 1354). Click the link to read more.

What motivates you to run?

It was raining when I woke up this morning, but as I drank my coffee I listened, but didn’t hear any thunder, so I decided to go on the local 5K.  I’d been looking forward to it, and I don’t mind running in the rain as long as it’s not pouring.

Either because of the rain or because it was this race’s inaugural, only about 50 people showed up to run, including quite an interesting bunch of women from 9 to 70+.  The starting line was funny, everyone kept moving to the back until the starting line had retreated several yards back and they had to encourage us to actually move forward.  I ran this with sister graduates of the local shoe store’s walk-to-run program – about 10 of us showed, including 3-4 who had never run a 5K before and a perky 10 year old girl who smoked nearly everyone.  Apparently the race itself was almost all women; when the awards were handed out the announcer said fewer than 10 men had run the race.

I was happy to run this one, it was a nice, flat course along the river and a cool morning, an enjoyable temperature change from the high heat we’ve been having.  For the first two miles I paced myself with a group of other women who were pushing a bit harder than I usually go but I figured I could always slow down later.  Later, they pulled ahead and I decided to slow a bit and enjoy myself.  Several snowy egrets fished in the river along our course, and a group of Canadian geese hung out on the sidelines.  The trees were glittering and the air smelled wet and earthy.  I’m so thankful to live in such a beautiful, wooded area with river trails and wildlife.

While I was running that last mile I was letting my mind wander and remembered something from the movie our family had watched the night before: in Percy Jackson and the Olympians there’s a moment when Percy is getting his butt kicked by a girl warrior in capture the flag, and his inner voice (really his father) says “go to the water – the water will give you strength”.  I laughed, but realized that for me (maybe because I’m a water sign? who knows) running near water does make me more relaxed, and being relaxed makes it easier to run a bit harder and also makes the run a bit more enjoyable.  Weird, huh?

As I neared the home stretch I realized that 3 miles goes by pretty quick, and almost felt a little sad when I saw that there wasn’t much race left.  (That should motivate me to do a 10K, right?)  I picked up tempo and finished at 32:07 (10:20 pace), which is fantastic for me these days.

Last week I starting increasing my running time to running 45 minutes, and it felt good as long as I kept to a relaxed pace.  So, maybe that 10K isn’t so far away.  As long as I keep to the river, or whatever is helping to push me along.

A 4.3 earthquake woke up the house this morning.  Guess Mother Earth knows how to celebrate.

Happy Birthday to my beautiful boy!